My mind was under attack yesterday. I let doubt and fear of the unknown consume and test my faith. #TheDevilTriedIt
As I reviewed my surgical paperwork, I began to spiral down a hole what-ifs: What if the neurologist messes up? What if my FMLA gets denied? What if I lose my memory or ability to walk? 😩
The list went on and on, and I began to feel worried, anxious, and upset.
I was bold with the Lord during my prayers this night.
I placed Him on a witness stand and questioned his motives and plan for my life. "What do you think you are doing? I shouted.
"Why are you allowing this to happen to me? What about my plans?... You're ruining everything," I prayed.
But God quickly put me in my place and brought me to this scripture;
The human heart plans the way,but the Lord directs the steps (Proverbs 16:9).
Seeing this scripture was the perfect reminder. I made plans -- good plans if you ask me. They were top notch, legit, and well thought out.
However, it is He who orders and guides my steps (which has always been a good thing...Lord knows I never know what I'm doing, even when I think I do).
Going through all of this has been frustrating and some days it's hard for me to grasp and understand the purpose of it all.
But I have to keep moving forward, knowing that God wants the best for me and will not give me more than I can withstand.